Ethny’s Birth
On Friday, March 16th, 2004, after performing with WindDance in Jackson Miss, we came home to find out we were expecting our first baby. We were overwhelmed with joy, but what is more overwhelming is that we live in a village where 200 people are just as excited as you are!
In watching my mom in the few years I’ve been practicing midwifery, I’ve seen God deal with women through pregnancy and birth, and He sure didn’t let me miss out on that wonderful opportunity. These are a few of the things I went through.
Right away I was faced with situation that would serve to enlarge my heart and abilities. I am studying to be a midwife, and although we greatly desired a baby, Zemar and I had thought it would be better to wait until I finished my internship in El Paso, Texas, as well as testing for my CPM. (Certified Professional Midwife) Zemar is also in the middle of studying to become a Master Herbalist. So when we found out that God was blessing us with a baby, I really had to come to a resting place in my mind in knowing that God was going to take care of everything we needed for this pregnancy and my studies.
All through my pregnancy God taught me things about being a wife and loving my husband more than myself. I struggled a lot when his work hours would run late or his job demands would keep him tied up. I had to learn to wait and enjoy those little moments that God gives and not try to make them on my own, for those moments that God gives are more fulfilling than any others. I also learned that the little things I do to make a difference, like just getting up and making him a good breakfast in the morning, or making sure the house was neat and clean when he came home, made a world of difference. If he felt my support, he was able to do that much better in his job and have an enjoyable day. I learned to find joy even in my everyday household chores because I was not only doing them for my husband, but for our Father —- even at 9 months pregnant.
Another mountain I had to overcome was learning to trust Zemar, as he took up most of the planning of our lodging and financial needs for our trip to El Paso for my internship. We had been married only 4 months when we found out we were expecting, so we were still getting to know each other as husband and wife as well as taking part in the busyness of village life, which can be overwhelming in itself. Once again I had to trust that he knew what he was doing and would take care of me even if he made mistakes.
In El Paso, I was working long hours and not getting the number of births I had hoped for, plus dealing with the competition I felt from other interns, something I wasn’t used to at all. Zemar was there waiting for me when I came “home” and helped keep me encouraged. After realizing this trip wasn’t working out as planned, we called and talked to the people back home and changed plans a little. We decided to come home 1 1/2 weeks earlier than intended and hoped that I would get ten births in before we had to leave. We almost gave up on getting even that many, but God surprised us all by giving me four births on the last day I was there, bringing the count up to exactly ten births!
There were also times in preparing for our new child when I would get anxious about whether we would have everything ready, if money would stretch for what we needed, etc. Zemar would answer my questions with “Just wait and trust God. God always takes care of us.” It was hard to do when I was feeling like I had to get my “nest” ready, but by leaning into his heart I got to watch God lavish His love on us, supplying everything we needed and more.
As my due date approached, still God continued to teach me about trust by letting me go two weeks overdue. I was fighting all the anxious thoughts every mother faces and the impatient frustration of waiting. I was so “over” being pregnant and ready to hold my baby; waiting was the last thing I wanted to do! I really had to draw near to God and ask him to give me grace.
I struggled again when the whole village left for a campout over the weekend at Nachez Trace State Park. Zemar and I are very active, outdoor people, so it was very different having to stay home and take it easy. It was another one of those times where I had to stop complaining about the things I couldn’t do and look at the things I could do. I had to realize I was at a new phase of my life. Zemar and I did at least get to ride out to the park during the day to join in on some of the fun and come home at night to our cozy little bed. I bet some of the others wish they would have done that! :)
Everybody came home Sunday afternoon. The village felt like home again, with children running everywhere and parents busy unpacking. That evening, I went down to watch Zemar’s dance practice; little did we know my labor would start during practice. We walked home together, wondering if this was really going to be it, or if it would fizzle out like before (I had had some prodromal labor earlier in the week). But by the time we made it up the hill and into our house, contractions were getting pretty strong.
We called the midwives (Mom and Ariel) and they came to tell us we were really in labor. There was no turning back now; we were finally going to hold our baby in our arms in just a few hours. When they told me, I couldn’t believe it and was so excited that I just started to cry. Immediately, phone calls went out all through the village that we were in labor, asking everyone to keep us in their hearts before God. Soon, our little living room was packed full of smiling grandparents and friends we had invited to be with us during the early part of labor.
It was the night before our first wedding anniversary and outside the night sky was crystal clear with a round, full moon casting its beautiful moonbeams over everything. The air was cool and quiet. It was as if our Father had written “I love you” all over the sky.I didn’t realize how much all of the little struggles I had been through with Zemar had strengthened our relationship until I went into labor. Then I got to really see and experience the deep, undying love and immense trust God had grown between us. On that lovely and unforgettable moonlit night, we drew close together and hid ourselves in the heart of our Father as he brought our new little bundle of joy into this world. When I would get tired and feel weak, I looked in Zemar’s eyes and saw his trust and belief in me; I trusted what I saw, gaining the strength I needed to labor on. I had learned so much about Zemar’s love for God and his love and care for me, and I felt very safe.
My mother and Ariel were right there supporting me the whole time, as well as Rachel (who’s like my second mom), who had come to be our photographer. The whole village was thinking about us and waiting all night for the sound of the shofar that would announce the birth of our baby. In the morning a call went out —- to the men at work and to the ladies at home — that I was exhausted from laboring all night and needed strength and to ask God to bring this baby quickly. Just knowing that —- that over 200 people were going to stop what they were doing, it didn’t matter where they were, to pray for me —- was enough to help me push the baby out.
About 20 minutes later, I was at the pushing phase and felt I could go no further —- that I would never be able to push this baby out! —- Zemar told me to take a breath and listen. So I did, and you’ll never believe what I heard. I heard the whole village standing on my porch singing me songs of praise that lifted my spirit and gave me strength to push the baby out. Even though labor seemed overwhelming at times, looking back it is a peaceful and beautiful memory because of the great love that surrounded us during that time.
Our Father then blessed us beyond our imagining with our very own baby girl, Ethny Jasmine Riggins, “fiery gift of God.” She weighed 7 lbs. 8 oz. and stared at everything with gorgeous big bright blue eyes. She was born on our first anniversary – May 23rd 05 at the exact time our wedding had started – 11:03 a.m. After she was born, her very proud daddy took her to the door to meet her village family who awaited her on the porch. The shofar then blew and everyone shouted for joy. All I have to say is – what a place we live in and what a God we serve!
Posted on Aug 11, 05:16 PM | Categorized under Articles—
